Hormones or Just Not Nice?

One of the lovely things about pregnancy is the sheer amount of hormones that are pumping through you at any given moment.  These lovely new friends can bring with them moments of unexplicable crying … and more likely in my case … uncommon rage.  Sure, people have joked that I have an alter ego named CJ (Commando Jenn), but I’ve done really well to keep her under control.  (But hey, when things need to be done, they need to be done, and if you aren’t moving as fast as I think you should be to get them done, then I might just tell you).  But I have noticed that over the past 38+ weeks, I’ve succomed to moments of sheer anger over the dumbest things.  Today for example …

We were at a local restaurant eating lunch.  There was a large group of us and the restaurant was a buffett, so that means there were a lot of empty plates scattered about the table.  The table behind us got up to leave, and thier dirty plates were still on thier table.  So, we put a few of our dirty stacks over there too, to get them off our table, since the bus-boy was gonna have to get them either way.  So as we were placing some plates on that table, said bus-boy approached.  I was sitting in just the right place to see his facial expressions and watch his mouth form unutterable words.  To put it nicely, he was “upset” that he had to pick up some extra plates and proceeded to call the people at our table some choice adjectives.  Well, it enraged me.  And if you know me, you know that I don’t hide my emotions from my face very well.  So I’m sitting there staring at this kid in horror that he would have the nerve to say such horrible things about the people who were paying his probably measly little paycheck.  Well, everyone sitting near me saw my face of horror, and of course promptly asked what was wrong.  And me, being me and pregnant me, proceeded to tell them exactly what had made me so angry … knowing that bus-boy was only a few feet away.

So that begs the question … was it the hormones, or was I just not very nice?

Of course, until about an hour ago, I felt completely justified in my anger. After all, its not like he was being forced to pick up those dishes like a servant, he was getting paid to do so for goodness sake! But then, as my nappie time wore on, I remembered what Pastor Jamie taught about this morning. Sigh. This kid probably was dealing with some crappy stuff in his life, probably just got chewed out by his boss, was looked down upon by his co-workers for being just the bus-boy, probably got paid some ridiculously low amount to pick up after people, and just didn’t want to be bothered at that moment with picking up our dishes.  Granted, he probably could learn a lesson to “say” things inside his head instead of mouth them out where people can see exactly what he’s saying.  But still. I don’t know what was going on in his life, but I proceeded to freak out and he probably very well heard me. Which I’m sure didn’t make his day any better.

So, I guess I don’t really have an excuse. Hormones or not, it wasn’t very nice.  I should probably download the weekend message and listen to it several times… and let it really sink in.  www.lwfc.org/downloads

HA! I’m NOT crazy afterall!

do you have a memory from childhood that no one else seems to share?  perhaps its a movie, a song, a cartoon, an event, or some other expereience that you seem to be the only one who remembers?  well, for me, that memory was Psalty.  i’ve asked people about it, but no one else seems to remember the singing blue song book.

i didn’t really “grow up” in church, i never went to VBS (i actually had to ask what VBS stood for my first year directing DBTW!!!).  but one summer i was visiting my cousin’s church and there was this big squishy, singing, dancing, blue song book named Psalty.  it kinda creeped me out, but kinda intruigued me.  but anyway … its nice to know that i’m not crazy. Psalty really did exist!

PROOF

on her own terms

so, the question i keep hearing over and over again is “what? you haven’t had that baby yet?”.  nope. sure havent. and as much as i wish i was done, i still have 2 weeks until the official and unofficial due date.  i’m learning more and more that charlotte is a lot like her momma.  she likes to do things on her own terms.  for example…

we went to el doctor today (hiphiphoray for weekly visits), and my blood pressure was up, so they of course do the doctor freak out thing and stick a bunch of monitors on you.  so i’m sitting there (in a quite comfie recliner though) while a nurse tries to find charlie’s heartbeat.  next door there was an infant screaming its little head off, so the nurse was getting really frazzled.  after about 5 minutes of charlie kicking the monitor and running away to hide (where, i’m not sure), another nurse came in to take over.  (i mean, they are concerned about my blood pressure and i’m sitting there while they can’t find my child’s heartbeat … yeah, thats helping).  so while the two nurses are standing there discussing who should be responsible for shutting the screaming baby up, the little monitor thingie is sitting next to my belly unattended.  and then charlotte decides that she’s okay with it being there and snuggles up next to it to provide a perfectly good heart beat signal.  the nurses were shocked that she found it on her own.  i’m telling you, she does things on her own terms. (the tests were all fine, btw. they just had to check on her.)

so, i’ve decided that charlotte does not like to perform and will be making her grand entrance on her own terms at her own time.  all i can do is make sure that i’m ready for it! so… here we go a-waiting.

i won’t be out-did

jamie got a super neato journal, and i didn’t want to be out done, so he got me a super pretty neato journal.  check it out…

i’m really excited! now i just have to get back to journaling! and this one is so big it will take me years to fill it! yeah!

trying to ignore the countdown

charlotte is now 37 weeks. which = full term.  sure, her due date is set at 40 weeks, but she is fully developed at this stage and they won’t stop me if i go into labor this very minute (sigh, that would be great).  i was born at 35 weeks and jamie was born at 38 weeks, so while the old wives tales say that you are always late with your first youngin, i am really hoping she comes early.  but i got some really good advice yesterday … twice.

i was talking with a friend of ours, peter john, and he reminded me that while its not always comforting, it is sometimes true that your first baby comes late.  so he suggested that i go ahead and prepare myself for her to be late, then if she comes early it will be a pleasant surprise.  then last night at the leadership update, pastor connie said pretty much the exact same thing.

so, here i am trying to ignore the countdown.  i’ve been saying all along that i wanted her to be born in june, and that was for several reasons.  first, the weather is just so hot that the less time i have to spend with the portable oven attached, the better.  second, there are like 8,000 people in our families and friends that are born in july (my brother – july 1; my mom & her twin – july 6; jamie’s cousin – july 10; my dad – july 27; my birth father – july 22 (?); and the list just goes on).  but i need to resign myself to the fact that her due date is july 10 and that we probably won’t meet her until then.

but in the mean time, its game on with lavendar, chamomile tea, pressure point massage, and long walks!

new found love

for those of you who know about love languages, mine are Quality Time and Physical Touch.  (please don’t feel the need to hug me every time you see me, it doesn’t work quite like that).  but you need to know that in order to really understand my new found love.

when i was in romania, tammy treated us all to a massage session.  it was the first time i had ever had one.  at first it was a little awkward (it was a guy massooose (don’t know how to spell that) and i didn’t really speak his language), but after i got over the weirdness, it was awesome. and a full half hour only cost us the equivelant of $4US!  since then i have had 15 minute chair massages, but not a full body treatment … until yesterday.

my dad bought me a certficate for a full hour full body treatement back in the fall.  at that point i knew i was pregnant and wanted to wait as long as possible before redeeming it, thinking that one day i would REALLY need it.  well, tuesday was the day.  it was one of my first official acts as a domestic engineer, and it was so worth it.  heck, it would have been worth the time and money just to go lay in that room with that music playing for an hour even if no one ever came in to give the massage! 

the lady i had was awesome.  and apparently giving a 9-month prego a full body treatment is challenging … a lot of pillows were involved. but it was incredible. it is a must-do for every mommie-to-be!  (dads, did you hear that??)  here’s the website of the place i went … so worth it!!

neat things

so today was a day. i tried my best to sleep late, but Charlotte had different plans and decided to wake me up by continuously assaulting my ribs until I got up.  then i folded a load of miniature laundry and successfully dyed another load of miniature laundry pink (its a good thing i’m having a girl!) thanks to a hot pink bib.  then i went to target, hung out at the office, went back to target, ran some other errands that involved rush hour traffic on I-40, then had a meeting, then came home.  yupp, that sums it up.

two neat things did happend today though.

One: I got flowers Pastor Steve sent me “Thank You” flowers.  See, I told you he was the best to work for!

Aren’t they purdy?

Two: I found a funny blog post:  http://yogamum.wordpress.com/2008/06/08/how-to-be-the-most-popular-mom-in-the-neighborhood/ 

a new found enemy

this afternoon after church i decided i wanted to do laundry.  scary … i know.  so i pulled out a stack of stuff i got at the baby shower that needed to be washed and proceeded to open the packages.  sounds simple enough, right? WRONG. it took me a solid 45 minutes to unpackage one laundry basket full of blankets, towels, washcloths, and bibs.  45 minutes.  why, you ask? here’s why…

those stupid little plastic thingies!  they were in everything.  the moment you think you got them all, another set shows up out of nowhere.  and you never get them all. as soon as you cut one end of it, the other end vanishes, only to be found later on the floor when you step on it and scream.  the worst were the washcloths.  seriously, there were about 4 in each tiny little 4 inch by 4 inch piece of terrycloth!  is there really a theft epidemic of baby wash cloths? really?  sigh … it was so unnecessary.  i wonder how many billions of dollars companies spend each year on using those stupid little things to keep stuff packaged.  whoever invented them … i hate you, but you are brilliant and probaby very very rich. 

Spreading My Wings

My last official day at “work” was Thursday.  I haven’t blogged about it yet because I wasn’t sure what to say.  People have been asking me since they found out I was changing careers, if I was sad to be leaving.  I have mixed feelings about it, honestly.  On the one hand, I’m so super excited about staying home with Charlotte that I can’t really think of much else.  But of course at the same time, I’m gonna miss being Pastor’s assistant. 

With any life change comes excitement and hesitation.  I loved my job, and for the most part, I think I was pretty good at it.  (You’d have to ask Pastor for an honest opinion on that one haha).  If the opportunity ever presented itself, I would take the job again in a minute!  Pastor Steve is by far, hands down, the BEST person to ever work for.  Sure, he expects and requires excellence, but that is what has gotten this ministry to the place that it is today.  That is why LWFC has been able to successfully make a difference in so many people’s lives!  Plus, you don’t ever have to guess as to what is going to “pass” … you know if its not the best, keep trying.  Another thing I really appreciate about Pastor is his grace.  Whenever I made a mistake (and really, it only happened once or twice … haha), he never made me feel like I was a moron for making that mistake. I’ve had bosses that did that.  He always gave me grace to fix the mistake and helped me to learn how to improve for the future.  Working for him taught me so many things, not only professionally but emotionally and spiritually as well.  One thing about Pastor that most people actually do know is that he really for real does love what he does.  He loves this church.  And that is so contagious.  You can see that reflected in the staff … he literally has to beg them to take all thier vacation days … because we would have all gladly camped out at the church. He is so accomodating and understanding of our need for family life. 

When I was graduating college a song came out that really said what I was feeling.  I was sad to be leaving college, but so excited about what life held for me.  And I think this song is very appropriate for this same situation (you can pretty much ignore the verses.  The chorus is really the good part). The excitement … and the hesitation.

 

Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere, I love this church.  You’ll see me around … probably more than you should, but I can’t help it … I love this place! So… here I go … learning how to fly!

feeling the love

Wow! I really cannot say enough how thankful I am for such an incredibly awesome family! On Saturday the staff, student ministries, and outreach teams, plus a ton of friends and family got together and threw me and Baby Charlotte a shower. I have been to showers thrown by the church before, so I had an idea of how super cool they can be … but when I walked into the warehouse and saw just how much effort was put in by so many people, I was really blown away. Here’s a few pictures I took to document the occassion … if anyone knows who was taking all the pictures (I just saw flashes, but never really caught who was taking them) please let me know. I would love to have copies of them!

Mmmmm … cuppie cakes!! My favorite!!

One of the birdhouses used to decorate the tables … now displayed in Charlie’s nursery.

The carseat from the Special Projects Team!

The complete bedding set from the group gift (mostly staff, I think!)

All the gifts piled into the nursery … and what a pile it was!

Thank you so much to everyone who was there, and THANK YOU especially to all the people that worked really hard to put the shower together! It means so much to us!